Have Anxiety and Depression??

mults · 11-15-2017, 12:17 PM

I've seen depression and anxiety in my wife and it's been somewhat hard for me to understand as I've not had to deal with any of these issues before I was married. It's very easy for me just to tell her to chill and accept things, but unless you are the one with symptoms, it's just talk.

She's tried various "flavors of the month" meds with limited success, so now she doesn't take anything. I am very proud and humbled that I have had a mostly positive influence on her condition and have to say that it was hard on me "taking some abuse" from her on the bad days. But I love her to death and know that it is her condition talking and not her heart and soul.

All I can say is that with support, love and understanding, she has now gotten a whole lot better over the 31 years we've been married and I actually heard her say yesterday, "oh f**k it, it's not important!!" One step-at-a-time, one step-at-a-time...

mikeb · 11-15-2017, 12:49 PM

Good topic; even if you are not directly affected it almost 100% likely a family member or friend is. Then you have the grey areas. For example, I dislike social gathers like family events, church, public speaker, etc. If I'm force to speak before a group my heart will race, similar to anxiety. Many will state that's normal and perhaps for some it is, but it toes the line. Many in my family can public speak like a walk in the park. Fwiw exercise, especially outdoors seems to stabilize me when I'm on edge.

Hotrodz · 11-15-2017, 05:23 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by mults

I've seen depression and anxiety in my wife and it's been somewhat hard for me to understand as I've not had to deal with any of these issues before I was married. It's very easy for me just to tell her to chill and accept things, but unless you are the one with symptoms, it's just talk.

She's tried various "flavors of the month" meds with limited success, so now she doesn't take anything. I am very proud and humbled that I have had a mostly positive influence on her condition and have to say that it was hard on me "taking some abuse" from her on the bad days. But I love her to death and know that it is her condition talking and not her heart and soul.

All I can say is that with support, love and understanding, she has now gotten a whole lot better over the 31 years we've been married and I actually heard her say yesterday, "oh f**k it, it's not important!!" One step-at-a-time, one step-at-a-time...

I am in the same boat with my wife and she has come a million miles from where she was when we first got married and she works hard every day to fight off the demons. I am an advocate of getting help, it doesn't mean you are broken it just a means of getting more tools to help you cope and provide a compass for finding true north again. As my counselor told me years ago when I was going through my divorce..."so you are depressed, that's normal just don't stay there to long. Don't do stupid...by a car, drink to much and stay away from drugs." Yeah, no hookers and blow lol.

Seriously, don't isolate yourself get outside and reach out to those that love you and let them help. I no that not easy for most guys, believe me I know as I am alfa male and I used to think I needed no one. Well my relationship are stronger and more meaningful because I can let others help me and it did get me out of my funk just knowing they cared and past no judgment on me.

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View Poll Results: What's going on in your head?
Depression	3	10.71%
Anxiety	8	28.57%
Self-Esteem	4	14.29%
I'm fine. What's wrong with you wackos?	13	46.43%
Voters: 28. You may not vote on this poll

11-15-2017, 12:17 PM	#1 (permalink)
mults A True Z Fanatic Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: Cleveland, OH Age: 71 Posts: 1,830 Drives: 2010 (40th) #706 Rep Power: 16887	I've seen depression and anxiety in my wife and it's been somewhat hard for me to understand as I've not had to deal with any of these issues before I was married. It's very easy for me just to tell her to chill and accept things, but unless you are the one with symptoms, it's just talk. She's tried various "flavors of the month" meds with limited success, so now she doesn't take anything. I am very proud and humbled that I have had a mostly positive influence on her condition and have to say that it was hard on me "taking some abuse" from her on the bad days. But I love her to death and know that it is her condition talking and not her heart and soul. All I can say is that with support, love and understanding, she has now gotten a whole lot better over the 31 years we've been married and I actually heard her say yesterday, "oh f**k it, it's not important!!" One step-at-a-time, one step-at-a-time... Hotrodz, Kzonts, Spoiler and 1 others like this. __________________ 40th Anniversary 'Z', 312.06HP/260.58TQ (Dynosty EcuTek Tune) Build Date/Number: 1/27/2010 #706 Berk HFC + CBE, R2C CAI, Clear Bra, Cleveland Z Club[/COLOR]

11-15-2017, 12:49 PM	#2 (permalink)
mikeb Base Member Join Date: Feb 2015 Location: gboro Posts: 80 Drives: 15 Sport Tech MagBlk Rep Power: 12	Good topic; even if you are not directly affected it almost 100% likely a family member or friend is. Then you have the grey areas. For example, I dislike social gathers like family events, church, public speaker, etc. If I'm force to speak before a group my heart will race, similar to anxiety. Many will state that's normal and perhaps for some it is, but it toes the line. Many in my family can public speak like a walk in the park. Fwiw exercise, especially outdoors seems to stabilize me when I'm on edge. scratchdvinyl, deuce189, osbornsm and 1 others like this. __________________ mlb Last edited by mikeb; 11-15-2017 at 01:04 PM.

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