Joke of the Day

AK370Z · 10-04-2010, 05:52 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by XwChriswX

Why do I feel like I'll rot in hell for laughing at this...

Edit: Thats why!

phelan · 10-04-2010, 05:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by AK370Z

im totally taking the forum stickers off of rin now

theDreamer · 10-04-2010, 05:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by phelan

im totally taking the forum stickers off of rin now

If you take off the forum stickers I want my sticker back.

XwChriswX · 10-04-2010, 05:56 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by phelan

im totally taking the forum stickers off of rin now

Isn't sticker swapping a weekly thing at the rate you whore Rin out??

phelan · 10-04-2010, 05:58 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by theDreamer

If you take off the forum stickers I want my sticker back.

i'll send you a 9" special edition one. i had it custom made just for you! it's bright and yellow, so it'll stand out on that piece of **** graphite color you have

AK370Z · 10-04-2010, 06:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by phelan

im totally taking the forum stickers off of rin now

vipor · 10-05-2010, 08:58 AM

daisuke149 · 11-22-2010, 09:34 PM

so yes im gonna revive this thread.. (maybe it wont really come alive again and i'll just sulk at my attempt)

but anyway.

-------------------------------------
A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.

"Mom", he asked, "Are these my brains?"

"Not yet," she replied

370zproject · 11-22-2010, 11:12 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by daisuke149

so yes im gonna revive this thread.. (maybe it wont really come alive again and i'll just sulk at my attempt)

but anyway.

-------------------------------------
A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath.

"Mom", he asked, "Are these my brains?"

"Not yet," she replied

Ish · 11-25-2010, 05:41 PM

These have been making their way around the aviation-related forums.

The TSA: Providing gainful employment to sexual predators since 2009

Can’t see London, Can’t see France, unless we see your underpants.

It’s not a grope; it’s a freedom pat.

If your lover is lacking in foreplay, come fly by us!

We always get to second base on the first date.

Security thru nudity!

We’ll touch you here, We’ll touch you there, We’ll even fondle your derriere

Hickory dickory dock, give us a chance and we’ll grab ur – you get the idea

Have a grope and a Smile

We rub you because we love you...in that special way

Nuts, butts, and scanner sluts. That's the way we roll.

You get on. We get off.

We've handled more balls than Barney Frank.

Going out west? We’re going down south.

Lift your sack…for freedom?

Perverts for peace.

TSA: Where Touching Your Junk is Not Just a Job, It's an Adventure

TSA: we bring repressed memories to life.

Announcing the new TSA Club Card: Every 12 pat-downs gets a reach-around!

Ish · 11-25-2010, 05:49 PM

While I have some free time...:

A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue.

Doctor: "What happened?"

Woman: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp."

Doctor: "I have a real good medicine for that. When your husband comes Home drunk, just take a glass of sweet tea and start swishing it in your mouth. Just swish and swish but don't swallow until he goes to bed and is a sleep."

Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn

Woman: "Doctor, that was a brilliant idea!
Every time my husband came home drunk, I swished with sweet tea. I swished and swished, and he didn't touch me!"

Doctor: "You see how much keeping your mouth shut helps?"

A truck driver sees a girl about to jump off a bridge; so he stops.

"What are you doing?" he says.

"I'm trying to commit suicide," she says.

"Well, since you're about to die, before you jump, would you give me a blow job."
So, she does.

After she's finished, the trucker says, "Wow! That's a wasted talent.
Why are you committing suicide?"

"My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl."

Why do African Baboons paint their nuts red?

So they can hide in the cherry trees.

So whats the loudest sound in the jungle?

Giraffes eating cherries.

Sibze · 01-13-2011, 06:27 PM

Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee in St. Peters Square , Rome .

The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest, when he walks into a room,
Everyone calls him 'Father'."

The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room
People call him 'Your Grace'."

The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a Cardinal. When he enters a room
Everyone bows their head and says 'Your Eminence'."

The fourth Catholic man says very proudly, "My son is the Pope.
When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Holiness'."

Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence,
The four men give her a subtle, "Well....?"

She proudly replies, "I have a daughter,

Slim,

Tall,

38D breast,

24" waist and

34" hips.

When she walks into a room, people say, "My God!"

shadoquad · 01-13-2011, 06:41 PM

Three midgets in a bar, arguing over who is the smallest.

The first midget says, "I might not be smallest, but I guarantee that I have the smallest head."

The second midget says, "That may be, but I bet you I have the smallest hands of anyone."

The third one says, "Hmmm, I don't know, but I definitely have the smallest penis."

So, they all decide to go to Guiness to verify their claims. The first midget walks in and comes out some time later, grinning from ear to ear, holding a certificate. "Read it and weep, boys. Smallest human head of any adult."

The second one goes in and comes out some time later elated and jumping around, he too with a certificate in hand. "Check it out, LOSERS! Smallest hands of any adult human male."

The third midget goes in but comes out only a little while longer with no certificate. Upset beyond consolation, he cries. "Who the F*CK is this 'AK370Z' fella, anyway?"

Sibze · 01-13-2011, 06:42 PM

Shado just

AK

m4a1mustang · 01-13-2011, 06:44 PM

10-05-2010, 08:58 AM	#817 (permalink)
vipor A True Z Fanatic Join Date: Aug 2009 Location: Euless, TX [ DFW ] Age: 41 Posts: 13,531 Drives: Nismo 09-0183 QAB Rep Power: 48	__________________ 2009 NISMO # 0193 \| QAB \| Albums! \| 05.04.10 (Dynojet) 291.94hp/248.28tq Oil Cooler (DIY) \| Custom Headlights \| GTSPEC Braces \| F.I. Long Tube Headers

01-13-2011, 06:44 PM	#825 (permalink)
m4a1mustang A True Z Fanatic Join Date: Feb 2009 Location: Northern VA Posts: 55,385 Drives: on two wheels Rep Power: 6962	__________________ - Steve Zs & Coffee - Saturdays at 10AM in Fairfax, VA and Columbia, MD (Click the banner!) LIKE us on Facebook!

11-22-2010, 09:34 PM	#818 (permalink)
daisuke149 My *** is famous! Join Date: Mar 2010 Location: Alpharetta, GA Posts: 4,849 Drives: 2013 Boss 302 PW Rep Power: 31	so yes im gonna revive this thread.. (maybe it wont really come alive again and i'll just sulk at my attempt) but anyway. ------------------------------------- A 3-year-old boy examined his testicles while taking a bath. "Mom", he asked, "Are these my brains?" "Not yet," she replied

11-25-2010, 05:41 PM	#820 (permalink)
Ish Base Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Workin' in the desert Posts: 45 Drives: no Z yet Rep Power: 15	These have been making their way around the aviation-related forums. The TSA: Providing gainful employment to sexual predators since 2009 Can’t see London, Can’t see France, unless we see your underpants. It’s not a grope; it’s a freedom pat. If your lover is lacking in foreplay, come fly by us! We always get to second base on the first date. Security thru nudity! We’ll touch you here, We’ll touch you there, We’ll even fondle your derriere Hickory dickory dock, give us a chance and we’ll grab ur – you get the idea Have a grope and a Smile We rub you because we love you...in that special way Nuts, butts, and scanner sluts. That's the way we roll. You get on. We get off. We've handled more balls than Barney Frank. Going out west? We’re going down south. Lift your sack…for freedom? Perverts for peace. TSA: Where Touching Your Junk is Not Just a Job, It's an Adventure TSA: we bring repressed memories to life. Announcing the new TSA Club Card: Every 12 pat-downs gets a reach-around!

11-25-2010, 05:49 PM	#821 (permalink)
Ish Base Member Join Date: Dec 2009 Location: Workin' in the desert Posts: 45 Drives: no Z yet Rep Power: 15	While I have some free time...: A woman goes to the doctor, beaten black and blue. Doctor: "What happened?" Woman: "Doctor, I don't know what to do. Every time my husband comes home drunk he beats me to a pulp." Doctor: "I have a real good medicine for that. When your husband comes Home drunk, just take a glass of sweet tea and start swishing it in your mouth. Just swish and swish but don't swallow until he goes to bed and is a sleep." Two weeks later the woman comes back to the doctor looking fresh and reborn Woman: "Doctor, that was a brilliant idea! Every time my husband came home drunk, I swished with sweet tea. I swished and swished, and he didn't touch me!" Doctor: "You see how much keeping your mouth shut helps?" A truck driver sees a girl about to jump off a bridge; so he stops. "What are you doing?" he says. "I'm trying to commit suicide," she says. "Well, since you're about to die, before you jump, would you give me a blow job." So, she does. After she's finished, the trucker says, "Wow! That's a wasted talent. Why are you committing suicide?" "My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl." Why do African Baboons paint their nuts red? So they can hide in the cherry trees. So whats the loudest sound in the jungle? Giraffes eating cherries.

01-13-2011, 06:27 PM	#822 (permalink)
Sibze A True Z Fanatic Join Date: May 2009 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 16,202 Drives: In your way Rep Power: 62	Four Catholic men and a Catholic woman were having coffee in St. Peters Square , Rome . The first Catholic man tells his friends, "My son is a priest, when he walks into a room, Everyone calls him 'Father'." The second Catholic man chirps, "My son is a Bishop. When he walks into a room People call him 'Your Grace'." The third Catholic gent says, "My son is a Cardinal. When he enters a room Everyone bows their head and says 'Your Eminence'." The fourth Catholic man says very proudly, "My son is the Pope. When he walks into a room people call him 'Your Holiness'." Since the lone Catholic woman was sipping her coffee in silence, The four men give her a subtle, "Well....?" She proudly replies, "I have a daughter, Slim, Tall, 38D breast, 24" waist and 34" hips. When she walks into a room, people say, "My God!"

01-13-2011, 06:41 PM	#823 (permalink)
shadoquad A True Z Fanatic Join Date: Apr 2010 Location: . Posts: 42,608 Drives: . Rep Power: 3886	Three midgets in a bar, arguing over who is the smallest. The first midget says, "I might not be smallest, but I guarantee that I have the smallest head." The second midget says, "That may be, but I bet you I have the smallest hands of anyone." The third one says, "Hmmm, I don't know, but I definitely have the smallest penis." So, they all decide to go to Guiness to verify their claims. The first midget walks in and comes out some time later, grinning from ear to ear, holding a certificate. "Read it and weep, boys. Smallest human head of any adult." The second one goes in and comes out some time later elated and jumping around, he too with a certificate in hand. "Check it out, LOSERS! Smallest hands of any adult human male." The third midget goes in but comes out only a little while longer with no certificate. Upset beyond consolation, he cries. "Who the F*CK is this 'AK370Z' fella, anyway?"

01-13-2011, 06:42 PM	#824 (permalink)
Sibze A True Z Fanatic Join Date: May 2009 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 16,202 Drives: In your way Rep Power: 62	Shado just AK