CoronaVirus

BGTV8

Some light hearted humour in an essentially sh1tty situation:

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Due to the current upset situation caused by the Corona Virus in the
economy, the Government has decided to implement a scheme to put
workers of 50 years of age and above on early, mandatory retirement,
thus creating jobs and reducing unemployment.

This scheme will be known as RAPE (Retire Aged People Early).

Persons selected to be RAPED can apply to the Government to be
considered for the SHAFT program (Special Help After Forced
Termination).

Persons who have been RAPED and SHAFTED will be reviewed under the
SCREW program (System Covering Retired-Early Workers).

A person may be RAPED once, SHAFTED twice and SCREWED as many times as
the Government deems appropriate.

Persons who have been RAPED could get AIDS (Additional Income for
Dependents & Spouse) or HERPES (Half Earnings for Retired Personnel
Early Severance).

Obviously persons who have AIDS or HERPES will not be SHAFTED or
SCREWED any further by the Government.

Persons who are not RAPED and are staying on will receive as much sh1t
(Special High Intensity Training) as possible. The Government has
always prided themselves on the amount of sh1t they give our citizens.

Should you feel that you do not receive enough sh1t, please bring this
to the attention of your Congressman, who has been trained to give you
all the sh1t you can handle.

Sincerely,
The Committee for Economic Value of Individual Lives (E.V.I.L.)

PS - Due to recent budget cuts as well as current market conditions,
The Light at the End of the Tunnel has been turned off.