Hey pussy, this viper will kill you!

ChaseZ · 07-07-2016, 10:22 AM

The most honest for sale ad ever!

Okay. Full disclosure. I almost killed myself in it.

It is VERY powerful. Extremely, EXTREMELY fast.

I’ve driven Ferrari’s that don’t feel as crazy as this thing. I am frankly afraid of it now.
That’s right. It’s in my garage and I’m afraid to drive it because it’s like a crazy steroid bull that wants to kill me.
I’ve done 130 mph on a Ducati while laughing into the face of death. The viper is a completely different bowl of crack. The engine sounds like 40 pit bulls eating kittens while lifting weights.
I cannot truly explain it’s power. It has whiplash acceleration in 3rd gear at 50mph. That sentence doesn’t even make sense. But it’s true.
That’s why I’m telling you. I will not have your soul on my conscience.
You need to know what you are getting into. What insane level of crazy you are buying.
Can you resist the urge to mash down the accelerator? Can you? Because it’s like owning your own demon. A demon that wants to kill you. We all know one person that for the right amount of money would kill you. But since no one is paying, they smile in your face and go about their day.
It’s like that except the Viper doesn’t bother to ever pretend it doesn’t want to kill you.
And it will do it for free.

Some brilliant engineer designed a beautiful sexy bulging body, fantastic suspension, great handling, aerodynamics, and all American style. While he was out on his lunch break, some demented maniac dropped 100 times more engine power than necessary into it and sent it out the door. It’s mentally unbalanced.

Look,
If you are the type of person that can be talked into having one more drink at midnight when you have a very important presentation or interview early the next morning, then the Viper is not for you.

The whole car is constantly whispering sweet lies to you.
“You got this”.
“Open me up and ride free, you got this”
“What are you a pussy?”
“Just do it”, “Do it”, “you got this”.

Do not do it. You don’t got it. You ARE in fact a pussy. And as we all know, pussy is mad good. But not that good.
You will sit on the curb and settle your heart after it tries to kill you the first time.
You will get back inside and it will immediately get back to the business of trying to get you to let it murder you.
“You got this. This time you know. That last time was just a fluke. You ain’t no pussy”.

Repeat after me.
You
Don’t
Got
This.

But for $30k you can look the devil in the eye and take this ride.

You were warned.

cv129 · 07-07-2016, 11:36 AM

What Ferrari was the owner comparing this to? A 308? Lol

Firebase99 · 07-07-2016, 11:54 AM

Hilarious!!! I want to have a beer with this guy!!

ChaseZ · 07-07-2016, 12:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cv129

What Ferrari was the owner comparing this to? A 308? Lol

Couple weeks back a 348 GTS wanted to play follow the leader. Poor guy didn't stand a chance.

madeinjapan · 07-07-2016, 12:52 PM

this is one of those cars that ive always wanted but when it came time to pull the trigger that money would get spent elsewhere

i mean you know what i mean

SwissCheese · 07-07-2016, 09:30 PM

The Viper has always been my dream car. The "icon", a gen 2, GTS, blue with white stripes. Oh man.

I've seriously rolled around the thought of selling my Z and getting one, but the gen 2's are getting to be 15+ years old!

cigarclifford · 07-07-2016, 09:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SwissCheese

The Viper has always been my dream car. The "icon", a gen 2, GTS, blue with white stripes. Oh man.

I've seriously rolled around the thought of selling my Z and getting one, but the gen 2's are getting to be 15+ years old!

I always liked the Viper GTS edition a well thought out sports car for its time indeed..

-Clifford

Slartibartfas · 07-07-2016, 11:31 PM

My father's '96 RT/10 accelerates harder in 4th gear than my Miata in first.

1LIFE · 07-07-2016, 11:49 PM

All that about a 15 year old stock Viper?!?! Lol

Rusty · 07-10-2016, 09:10 PM

Is that a stock motored Viper? Wait until you drive one with 800hp at the wheels.

Just seen a Blue with black stripe '17 ACR at a dealership in Carlisle Pa. today.

Been serious thinking about trading in the Nismo for a '17 ACR.

cv129 · 07-10-2016, 10:50 PM

^ok let's form a line for dips on Rusty's part out

Rusty · 07-10-2016, 10:54 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cv129

^ok let's form a line for dips on Rusty's part out

If I sell the motorhome. I could buy a 488 GTB. BUT the wife AIN'T going to let that happen.

07-07-2016, 10:22 AM	#1 (permalink)
ChaseZ A True Z Fanatic Join Date: May 2016 Location: Calgary Posts: 3,799 Drives: 16 370z Rep Power: 94682	Hey pussy, this viper will kill you! The most honest for sale ad ever! Okay. Full disclosure. I almost killed myself in it. It is VERY powerful. Extremely, EXTREMELY fast. I’ve driven Ferrari’s that don’t feel as crazy as this thing. I am frankly afraid of it now. That’s right. It’s in my garage and I’m afraid to drive it because it’s like a crazy steroid bull that wants to kill me. I’ve done 130 mph on a Ducati while laughing into the face of death. The viper is a completely different bowl of crack. The engine sounds like 40 pit bulls eating kittens while lifting weights. I cannot truly explain it’s power. It has whiplash acceleration in 3rd gear at 50mph. That sentence doesn’t even make sense. But it’s true. That’s why I’m telling you. I will not have your soul on my conscience. You need to know what you are getting into. What insane level of crazy you are buying. Can you resist the urge to mash down the accelerator? Can you? Because it’s like owning your own demon. A demon that wants to kill you. We all know one person that for the right amount of money would kill you. But since no one is paying, they smile in your face and go about their day. It’s like that except the Viper doesn’t bother to ever pretend it doesn’t want to kill you. And it will do it for free. Some brilliant engineer designed a beautiful sexy bulging body, fantastic suspension, great handling, aerodynamics, and all American style. While he was out on his lunch break, some demented maniac dropped 100 times more engine power than necessary into it and sent it out the door. It’s mentally unbalanced. Look, If you are the type of person that can be talked into having one more drink at midnight when you have a very important presentation or interview early the next morning, then the Viper is not for you. The whole car is constantly whispering sweet lies to you. “You got this”. “Open me up and ride free, you got this” “What are you a pussy?” “Just do it”, “Do it”, “you got this”. Do not do it. You don’t got it. You ARE in fact a pussy. And as we all know, pussy is mad good. But not that good. You will sit on the curb and settle your heart after it tries to kill you the first time. You will get back inside and it will immediately get back to the business of trying to get you to let it murder you. “You got this. This time you know. That last time was just a fluke. You ain’t no pussy”. Repeat after me. You Don’t Got This. But for $30k you can look the devil in the eye and take this ride. You were warned. axmea? likes this.

07-07-2016, 11:36 AM	#2 (permalink)
cv129 A True Z Fanatic Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Dallas, TX Posts: 3,192 Drives: 09 Nismo, 16 Nismo Rep Power: 159827	What Ferrari was the owner comparing this to? A 308? Lol DEpointfive0 likes this. __________________ Setrab \| RE-71 \| SPL \| JRZ \| Nismo \| ARK \| Whiteline \| RacingBrake \| CJM Oil Pan \| Ti shield

07-07-2016, 11:54 AM	#3 (permalink)
Firebase99 A True Z Fanatic Join Date: Sep 2013 Location: fl Posts: 1,372 Drives: 14 3.8 Gen Coupe GT Rep Power: 14033	Hilarious!!! I want to have a beer with this guy!! __________________ '14 3.8 Genesis Coupe, '13 Volvo S60, '04 Honda Accord, '13 370Z-sold, '05 350Z Touring-sold, '92 300Z Twin Turbo-sold, '82 280ZX-gone, '79 260Z-gone

07-07-2016, 09:30 PM	#6 (permalink)
SwissCheese Track Member Join Date: Aug 2013 Location: Iowa Posts: 785 Drives: 2012 370Z NISMO Rep Power: 66	The Viper has always been my dream car. The "icon", a gen 2, GTS, blue with white stripes. Oh man. I've seriously rolled around the thought of selling my Z and getting one, but the gen 2's are getting to be 15+ years old! cigarclifford likes this. __________________ Current Ride: 2012 Nissan 370Z NISMO #0389 Mods: Fast Intentions Resonated Test Pipes and TDX Exhaust with 18" Resonators (#1054), K&N Drop-Ins, GTR Start Button

07-07-2016, 11:31 PM	#8 (permalink)
Slartibartfas Track Member Join Date: Apr 2016 Location: Houston Posts: 551 Drives: 2011 G37S sedan Rep Power: 10	My father's '96 RT/10 accelerates harder in 4th gear than my Miata in first. __________________ 2011 Journey Sport sedan 7AT \| SPL front, SPC rear camber arms \| ARK Grip cat-back \|

07-07-2016, 12:52 PM	#5 (permalink)
madeinjapan Banned Join Date: Jan 2016 Location: pistolvania Posts: 1,387 Drives: 2013 g37x 2014 370z Rep Power: 0	this is one of those cars that ive always wanted but when it came time to pull the trigger that money would get spent elsewhere i mean you know what i mean

07-07-2016, 11:49 PM	#9 (permalink)
1LIFE Track Member Join Date: Dec 2012 Location: Louisville, Ky Posts: 513 Drives: Fast Lane Rep Power: 61	All that about a 15 year old stock Viper?!?! Lol Joker_J likes this. __________________ Built GReddy TT "I downshift next to Prius so the driver hears me hurting the environment"

07-10-2016, 09:10 PM	#10 (permalink)
Rusty Ronin Samurai - Assassin Join Date: Dec 2011 Location: Fayettenam,Pennsyltucky Age: 68 Posts: 34,884 Drives: 2011 Nismo GM 6M Rep Power: 2684436	Is that a stock motored Viper? Wait until you drive one with 800hp at the wheels. Just seen a Blue with black stripe '17 ACR at a dealership in Carlisle Pa. today. Been serious thinking about trading in the Nismo for a '17 ACR. __________________ 浪人 - 殺し屋 "The Difficult Anytime, The Impossible By Appointment Only" http://www.the370z.com/members-370z-...o-journal.html

07-10-2016, 10:50 PM	#11 (permalink)
cv129 A True Z Fanatic Join Date: Jul 2011 Location: Dallas, TX Posts: 3,192 Drives: 09 Nismo, 16 Nismo Rep Power: 159827	^ok let's form a line for dips on Rusty's part out Rusty and James10694 like this. __________________ Setrab \| RE-71 \| SPL \| JRZ \| Nismo \| ARK \| Whiteline \| RacingBrake \| CJM Oil Pan \| Ti shield

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