rear transmission seal

steering wheel

turn signals (optional in BMW)

universal joints

Voltage Regulator

wheels

X-band radar detector

yellow racing stripes on an orange 'cuda

Z badge

arriving safely

Barf bag missing when you really need it

...somehow THAT'S your idea of "fun"?!?, mr. o...

carry-on space under seat

Delta Airlines flight attendants who give me hugs when they see me board

...and WHY are you bored whilst getting a hug from a stew; unless it was my ex???

experiencing the "mile-high" sensations

farting quietly at 36,000 feet

guessing favorably if'n they're serving pepsi or coke

having two seats to myself

inspecting, and SEEING, that the plane has two secure wings

jamming through the terminal from one E to A concourses at ATL, barely making the connecting flight and finding out I was upgraded (true story from last Thursday)

keeping my kewl whilst being bounced around, severely, during heavy turbulence, due to too many rum & cokes and the wonderful childhood remembrance of roller-coasters

looking at flight attendants' stockinged legs

mentioning to my fellow traveler that he's staring, almost perversely, at the stewardess' legs and watching his face turn beet red...

nylon stockings on flight attendants' legs make my mind wander

overhearing moaning and groaning coming from the lavatory and then seeing just a dude exit, vacating the "club"

porn viewing on my laptop in first class

quick, hopefully unnoticed, peeks at the guy's laptop in the seat next to me...and noticing he's turning beet-red again

reclining all the way flat in Delta One Class

seriously considering coughing fluidly into the bastard's face after he reclined his seat into my entire lap and enjoying his reaction when he sees my cold sores...

taking the time to appreciate the young flight attendants' stocking-clad calves

unusually long time taking to get the stew's attention for service until seeing the flight marshall's handcuffing a suspect that repeatedly grabbed the nylon stocking of thee aforementioned stews, equalling out my dry throat vs. a worthy visual of a hard-core pre-vert getting his "juice"-dues w/o out getting any on me...

very lovely stewardesses upon whom to fix my gaze

watching this guy, wondering why he's seated between two air marshals, handcuffed, but still gazing, as if in a drunken stupor, at each stewardess' passing

xray machine revealed bondage equipment in my Tumi bag

yelling loudly, profusely, joyfully when it was discovered by TSA agents that some dude's bag did not contain a gun, (ironically "bulging" against the side of his thin-leathered carry-on) butt, was an 8" dildo intended to harm only his own bad self or 'loved ones'...whew

Z-car photo sharing with fellow passengers

abscess removal