Over 30 and still single, post here.

Ghostvette · 01-10-2014, 03:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Misnomer

I'm not saying Frozen isn't a great movie, just that it might not be the best conversation fodder for two people who don't know each other yet.

Why does a first date have to be ALL talking? Why can't there be both talking and entertainment? First dates are about getting to know each other, but that can happen whether you're talking or not. Do you laugh at the same lines? Does she cry way too easily, or text during the movie? Does he leave his trash on the floor? Etc. It's not that you're studying the other person or critiquing them the whole time or anything, it's just that little things like that can tell you just as much about someone -- and your level of compatibility with them -- as their words.

I'm clearly in the minority here, but I think a movie + dinner/coffee/drinks (movie first!) is a perfectly good first date. I also think that a show + dinner/coffee/drinks is a great first date, and you aren't talking during those, either.

I agree. The movie/dinner/drinks has been my 'reliable' first date. It gives me an opportunity to be observant and ask questions/talk over dinner. I've had more than my share of dates that didn't get past the dinner stage because of no chemistry or the 'I'm glued to my phone texting everyone else rather than talking to you' behavior. IMHO, the latter is just rude. Emergencies are one thing, but having a texting conversation with who knows who while at dinner with someone else smacks of high school behavior and over 30 is just ignorant. Yes, first dates are nerve-wracking, we both want to make a good impression, but not seem desperate.

I had one 'first-date' that I knew within 5 minutes it wasn't going anywhere. Trying to get simple information like 'what do you do' was like pulling teeth. She kept talking about how someone was coming over to her house to do a photo-shoot for a magazine and topics that were all about her. Not a single question about what I do, just a litany of complaints. I said "you know, maybe we should try this another time, this just doesn't seem to be a good day." Probably a wise choice, because she had cancelled the first 2 attempts to get together. I chalked it up as a learning experience, and I don't worry about it.

Like Chuck said earlier in this thread, it's a numbers game. Somewhere out there is someone we can get along with, don't be in a hurry, just relax and have fun.

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