clothes

doing cunninglus for more than 30 minutes

ejaculating after more than 30 mins.

Fortunes

good looking dudeness

huge ______

insertable penis

just being one's self (as long as that self has a large bank account)

knowing that every kiss begins with KAY jewelers

"liking" the same stuff she likes (e.g. sh!tty movies, antiquing, actual conversation, adopting stray dogs, trips to Joann Fabrics, etc.)

muff-diver extraordinaire

never complaining about endless shopping experiences at Target

overjoyed whilst watching oprah with my woman and taking 0's info to heart

putting her needs, regardless of how frivolous and stupid, in from of my own

quick mounting and sexing her up on the agreed upon stipulation that after the love is gone that there's no kisses or oral sex...

remembering all the "anniversaries" -- first kiss, first phone call, first time walking the dog together, first movie, first place we had dinner, etc. etc.

sticking things she enjoys into somethings you REALLY enjoy being in...

talk talk talk -- listening to her as she goes on endlessly about her day, what she said, what she heard, what other people said, other people's trivial problems, what they wore, to whom they are married, how they are wronged, etc. etc.

uterus-probing as far in as humanly possible with one's tongue

vagina pampering

washing regularly

x-rated vhs collection from the early 1980's

yelling "sweet-nothings" near the top of your lungs whilst cumming

Z-car ownership makes her crazy with passion

attack

ballistic missiles

concrete bunkers

Delta Force

elite forces

F. U. B. A. R.

Cluster-Fvck

hellcat

incendiary devices

jarheads

killing zones

land mines

mortar rounds

napalm

officer training