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Victory dance with high fives all around by the crew after a semi-successful landing
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window shade battles with a fat smelly woman with anger issues
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X-ray machine proficiently operated by a cluster of top notch TSA professionals
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Yummy little sandwich (for $15)
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zebras are not emotional support animals
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New Category: Why She Left Me
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Always was jealous that I still slept with all of my past wives once in awhile
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being more in love with my Z than her
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Caught me with my telescope aimed at the neighbor lady’s bathroom window more than a few times
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"doing" myself more often than her
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Emitting noxious fumes around her and her friends without saying I was sorry
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forgetting her birthday every year
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Getting “bone” when you see her girl friends at the pool
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having to say you are sorry for not coming home all night -- one too many times
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Ignoring her when my friends come over to watch sports every weekend
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